12/12/13

BluCanny

100_8998

Back Then

when my vocabulary was about six words long
even ahead of Outside, Kitty, NaNa, No, NoWay
BluCanny was my favorite word
delivering anticipation
of unwrapping
crackly cellophane
hard lozenge
going liquid on my tongue
mentholated tingle zings
like snowflakes landing
vanishing in a spark
going viral
tongue to throat
expanding
dancing
in breath
in heart
zapping

through veins
curling
toes and hair

Now
You are my blue candy.

~Nara Malone

dVerse Meeting the Bar challenge tonight is to go home to the roots of our voice and language to write something that is "...uniquely you -- using the words you might say to a neighbor or friend, keeping it familiar and seeking to make it distinctly you, about you, in your vernacular." This is also my contribution to G-Man's Friday 55. Drop by to see what others wrote or to join the fun yourself.

29 comments:

  1. Oh how you turned it into a love poem by that last line.. I had to go back to the rest of the poem and see this creation

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  2. Nara, you have managed to work 'blue candy' into a delightfully sensual poem!

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  3. awwww nice... made me smile... when i was a kid i loved lakritzschecken and brausepulver.... no idea what the english word for this is...smiles

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  4. You rocked prompt, and shared a sweet 55, bang on in touch with the dVerse challenge, & your inner child; BluCanny indeed! wonderful ride.

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  5. ha. nice...i used to have a grandfather that kept candy in his pocket...hard candy wrapped much like yours, only not blue....oo la on that close though...big smiles.

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  6. Deeply moving, Nara. Even in love it seems there is a bit of the child in us. Made me smile.

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  7. How fresh, and sweet! I wanted a poem on coinages (every family has them and most best friends too) and especially cool how the piece turns into a love poem at the end. Blue Candy indeed. I love it!

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  8. I can only imagine the unwrapping now.... Nicely done!

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  9. But I don't think I would have preferred being candy to a woman. That woman sucks.

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  10. a girl after my own heart - love menthol lollies (sweets) ~ interesting and fun write Nara ~ smiles

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  11. Fantastic last line. Nice build up.

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  12. Oh, I wasn't disappointed… I was waiting for the "zing' - (for me, it was butterscotch hard candies)

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  13. Oh, this was so sweet. :) My favorites were these hard button candies in a tin that were fruit-flavored and given out by my mother when you were especially well-behaved. :)

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  14. Nara Malone...
    I wish I were a Lozenge!
    I just love those personal little insights.
    Loved your soothing 55
    It's hard to find the words of how much I appreciate your
    support when you play...You Rock Baby...Have a Kick Ass Week-End

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  15. I still love Candys....... Its part of my Daily life to have one....... Its lovely

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  16. Lovely Nara - and the close, perfection.
    Anna :o]

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  17. I had not realized this was also your 55! Thank you for visiting mine Nara.

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  18. Vivid with a sense of the past, and the continuity of desire, however it may change its object--I really enjoyed the short, sharp little descriptions and the sense of self you project--I'd say you did an excellent job meeting both prompts, Nara.

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  19. Sweet. My childhood candy memories are all about chocolate. But I loved your ending.

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  20. This feels really fresh and vivid. Love this.

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  21. oh very vivid!!and loved the way you found it to the end!

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  22. Very clever, Nara, a fun development from young to old. K. (Manicddaily)

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  23. Nara, I loved your comment on my vernacular poem, and this, yours, is great. You remember the "itty bitty" words... "blucanny" cracks me up. I'm hooked on Vicks Menthol all winter, and I know that tingle. You made this come alive to the point that I can taste the menthol, even now! Peace, Amy

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Thanks for sharing your thoughts.